2，20，200

嘴里是拼了命的讲辛苦，讲要放弃了。。。可是说着说着，哭着哭着，闹着闹着，心灰，心淡，不知不觉的再过2个月就是2年了。。。

是时间过得很快，还是我们经历得太多了？

就如我所说，习惯真的是很恐怖，一旦习惯了，真的再也不想去改变了，尤其是我这样的年纪，说老不老，说年轻真的是笑话。。。

2年了，生活习惯摸透了，脾气也摸透了，知道什么时候该讲话，什么时候该闭嘴，知道他想要的是什么，就如一上车我就会自然而然的拿起水罐打开盖子给他喝水，真的是再也自然不过了，知道每天应该做的家务事，知道该怎么做才不会被骂，什么再难看的样子也看惯了。。。。我打呼的样子，磨牙的样子，憔悴的样子，他全看完完了。。。所以想说有谁会再接受我这些样子呢？

过了想到处去暧昧的时期，过了想到处拈花惹草的时期。。。现在的我只想安安定定的，静静的一只眼睁一只眼闭的过日子，只要我还在你的心里，我什么都接受得了。。。静静的等待。。。

再找一个啦朋友们说，可是真的那么容易咩？随手可得咩？而且也不想了。。。

希望不止是2年好吗？再过很多个20年可以吗？？？

party animal?

i think im slightly...erm...a little bit party animal!!!haha...

just within 2 weeks from the day i permanently staying in kl,i had at least 4 times clubbing....haha...erm...stil consider ok rite???

im jus enjoying drinking,dancing...nth else...hehe...so feel free to come when u feel like party...

working...

started working!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!as a secretary in a law firm!!!!!!!!!!!erm...im not only serving 1 lawyer but 3....this is only my 1st week...but im tired...due to manyth hv to be done b4 due date!!!!the ofice separate in 2 floors,im in new wing,but most of the fax tray,copy machine,admin office,most of the main thing is located in 20th floor while im in 19th floor...so after i fair a letter to be sent out,i hv to climb stairs up n down!!!so thr is lots lots lots of letter n doc tht need to be sent to 20th floor!!!!hopefully i can slim down bcoz of this...

im stress as well...well,working in a law firm,mistaken is not allowed due to this is a law firm...no credibility at all if u keep make mistake rite????so everyth not only double check but is triple even more than tht...

erm...im jus in the company,but i ald got lots thing to handle due to the last secretary was so lazy,left so many files tht need to be handle in a very short time...i hv to sort everyth out in blur blur conditions...luckily sheena is here,everyth i jus ask her...phew~~~

working life is tiring...i sleep early everyday coz i run lots in the morning,hahahaha...but im stil party around!!!!!yeah!!!!work hard but play harder!!!m i rite???haha...

i love my job,while im working im chatting wf my dearest....im so so happy,we chat like last time in email so tht the boss wont found out n we seem very hard working coz keep checking our mail...haha...im really enjoy to chat wf all my dearrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr jason,c.en,ah hong,ru chin...wil add more in my daily email list...mun yu?sheena?kian hooi?who else....haha....they ar the ppl who light up my day when im down n frustrated!!!!!

i think i like my life now,at least i wont b keep thinking of u everyday every minutes tht makes me so suffer...at least i fully utilized my time to work n play...i wish i could let u goooooooooooooooooooo...bless me.....

心淡

离开了让我开心，也让我伤心的地方。。。离开了熟悉的味道，熟悉的生活方式。。。我比想象中还不习惯。。。我比想象中的思念。。。

姐莲生日，我想回去，因为她希望我回去，而且之前我生日她也为我铺排了一切，让我过了很美好很美好的生日。。。基于有情上，感激心态，我真的很想回去。。。可是却被你一口拒绝了。。。我真的真的很失望，真的。。。可是我能怎样？你还要我不要让他们知道是你不让我回去的，我只好欺瞒说是上班的原因我回不去。。。

其实，我真的想走出你的影子。。。真的想。。。我希望我做得到。。。

分手只要一个人的决定，可是相爱却需要两个人在同时间互生情愫而结合。。。何时容忍会让我清醒而放开这错误的决定？爱上你是我的错，可是离开你我又舍不得。。。

away soon...

after bcome 'supergal' fly here fly thr(hometown to kl) for 3 month...finally i wil permanently staying in kl right after christmas...n i knw,i gonna start missing u....

daily routine!!!

wake up early in the morning,wash cloth,need to wait for few hrs if the cloth is too much as he need to wash all the cloth separately...
fill water into all empty bottle then reboil again...
prepare n boil chinese herbal as to reduce his cholestrol...
only finish all his thing only i can turn on my pc n go bath...
finish bath,start having all my healthy drink-organic,collagen,enzyme,fresh fruit juice make by myself...full...
wash all the dishes tht he left last9...
while waiting for the cloth,im sitting down n online...
hang all the cloth then im done wf my half work...

waiting him to wake up then going to breakfast...
sent home and start housework again...
sweap n mop whole house...
prepare all the thing for cooking..
if i stil got time i can online n watch astro..ahaha...

counting the time and start cooking,serve him to eat n wash all the dishes again,while he is laying on sofa n watching movie...
after clean the kitchen i hv to kept all the cloth...
if he would like to go out,then im allowed to follow,i wil be out til late night...
if im not allowed to follow,then i wil spend my whole night watching movie in the room..
b4 sleep,i hv to make sure everyth hv to be done...if not i wil get in trouble...

im spending my day like this everyday!!!!!!!!!i wanna escape to my own world!!!!!

happiness...

wil down to kl again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!as another old old fren married...hv to attend the dinner again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!seeing frens around me all getting married,feel like they ar so so happiness...they found their true love,they spend the rest of their time wf the person tht they love....

i dunno y im so so so tolerate....y i hv to bear all ur angryness all the time???y i hv to let u throw away wat i had cook wfout saying anyth although my heart is really really pain???

i jus wan to hv a normal life!!!!!